Good challenges

Last night I had a catch up with David and Adam who I photographed together last December. I’ve been catching up with Adam quite regularly but I haven’t seen David since the shoot. We chat from time to time on Facebook and recently David sent me a message saying that he’d just seen the erotic shoot in QAMA Magazine that I did with Chris. Not only that, he’s really keen to do some artistic erotic work.

Now I knew that David had no problem with full frontal and I had even seen a shot or two he’d done with other photographers where he was a bit aroused but knowing he’s essentially up for whatever as long as it’s creative, interesting and beautiful was great to hear. It’s also worked out really well that I’ve been sent the brief for Issue #3 of QAMA.

So, David and I have two months to refine the idea that we’ve started discussing, lock down the shoot time and make some wildly sexy beautiful images! It’s going to be so much fun. Maybe after all these years lamenting how shy Sydney models are, I just needed to find one and it’s started the ball rolling! Now if I can just keep the ball(s) rolling!

Don’t forget to play

When I was in Naxos, last month I saw a t-shirt for sale that I should have bought but didn’t. It said “Don’t forget to play”. That’s something that as adults we so often do. We get very caught up on what we think we should do and what society will approve of. I really like the idea of just doing something childish every now and then.

Yesterday I saw this video (below) to Macklemore’s new single Glorious. In the video he goes to pick up his real life grandmother for her 100th birthday and takes her out on an adventure day being silly and having fun.

You know how parents aren’t allowed to have a favourite child but grandparents totally are? My grandmother on Dad’s side adored me and we got on like a house on fire. If she were alive today I would love to have taken her out on a day like this just being silly and fun. She had a laugh that was loud and inappropriately bawdy at times. It was awesome.

So, go out and play today. Just do something small and silly to bring a smile to your face.

Frustrating times

Australian politicians seem to be in full blown pathetic mode and we are looking down the barrel of a $122 Million waste of time with a Postal Plebiscite to gauge the public opinion on Marriage Equality which is non-compulsory, non-binding and skewed to fail. Yesterday I had a long discussion on Facebook with a friend of a friend who even though she is atheist, she was using the bible to say that Marriage is a religious thing so shouldn’t be changed. Guess what? It’s not! 75% of marriages in Australia are civil ceremonies these days.

As a Marriage Celebrant about to do my first ceremony, I am allowed to officiate at a ceremony that I am currently unable to experience myself. That stings a bit and the arguments that are coming out already about pedophilia, sanctity of marriage etc are so hurtful. We had one Politician say that he has affectionate friendships with his buddies that he goes cycling with but they don’t need to get married. Yes he likened long term loving relationships of gay people to mates who cycle together.

I’m trying to stick to factual and logical arguments when countering the stupidity but it’s getting harder.

This beautiful video from Tom Daley and Dustin Lance Black’s wedding shows what we are after. We aren’t trying to steal children or tear apart the fabric of society. We just want to be able to commit to the person we love in exactly the same way that straight couples can. It’s not hard.

A touch more touch

As I mentioned recently, this morning I went to a “Touch Space Workshop”. There were 18 guys and a huge variety of bodies and ages. I’m the first to admit that I looked around and was worried that there weren’t many guys at all that I was physically attracted to. Then I thought about why I was there and what it was about. It’s not about getting off with someone or being attracted to them but instead it was about letting down barriers about touch and intimacy as well as consent.

There were two groups. One was blindfolded and the other not. The people with blindfolds were receiving touch which could be sensual or even fairly blatantly sexual or just non intimate touch.

It was quite challenging but freeing to take note of who might not have been receiving touch and going to make sure they were included.

When it came time to receive touch while being blindfolded I was lucky. I was never left standing there not being attended to and I quite often had two guys exploring. Being blindfolded even though I knew that the guys I wasn’t into were part of the experience, taking away that visual connection means you just let go of that and any hangups associated with it.

It was almost overwhelming being touched by two people at times in very sensual and intimate ways and not doing anything to reciprocate. I’d recommended it for everyone.

What’s your policy?

My host in Berlin runs his Mister B&B as a clothing optional space because that’s how he likes to live his life. It’s precisely the reason I booked to stay there. He had recently just done exactly the same nude sailing trip from Dubrovnik to Split in Croatia that I did two years ago. He was showing me his photos and I asked if there had been a discussion about photos and whether people were ok with full frontal being taken. He said that everyone had been totally fine with it without any terms and conditions.

When I did the same trip two years ago some people hadn’t cared at all, others said fine but they can’t go anywhere and some said no to frontal at all. All of those options are perfectly fine. People should have the right to their own image and how it is shared.

My problem with photos being taken of me by other people is how my body looks, not about my cock. If I’m feeling fat or out of shape I’m less likely to want a photo out there.

So I’m asking a question that I’m sure I’ve asked before. Of all my lovely nudist readers, if you are hanging out nude with your mates what’s your policy on photos?

What is your policy on nude photos?

  • Whatever, I don't care (39%, 77 Votes)
  • Frontal photos but no sharing (28%, 56 Votes)
  • No photos at all (20%, 39 Votes)
  • Non frontal photos only (13%, 25 Votes)

Total Voters: 197

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Misplaced my modesty

When the nearly-celibate version of Brenton went on holiday, I was hoping he might not come back and it would seem that at least for the time being he is still missing. Slutty Brenton is still having some fun and enjoying the change of pace.

With my housemate currently out of the country for work the opportunities for sluttiness have increased a little. Not that he’d ever stop me hooking up but it just seems easier without a housemate sitting on the lounge when you want to welcome horizontal company.

There has been something that I’ve found a little surprising. Given my tendency to be naked when I’m home alone, especially when expecting previously mentioned horizontal company, I’ll usually have some porn on, clothes off and cock in hand in the lead up to the main event. When the guy rings the doorbell it’s far from unusual for me to answer the door naked and hard. That often gets a comment or look of surprise. My question is why?

If you have already discussed that you are coming to my place because the house is all mine at the moment, and we are going to be getting naked for the shenanigans (is there any other way?) why would it surprise you to find me already naked? I’m certainly not throwing the door wide open so the street can see but if we are about to penetrate each other there doesn’t seem to be much need for modesty. Maybe people expect a bit more of a tease but for a Grindr/Scruff hookup I really don’t see the point.

When brothers collide

As gay men, we seem to have a real thing for brothers. I know I have a brothers/twins fantasy. It’s also a common fetish for a lot of gay men to see guys wrestle or fighting for dominance.

In this series for XEX Magazine Matthew and Andrew Billman pose in some very sexy photos where there is a real brotherly fight for dominance. The shots are really cool and while they have a cool style to them they aren’t over stylised. It’s almost like a Rufskin lite. In fact some of the gear they are wearing is indeed Rufskin.

I wonder if the Billman brothers actually do have a competitive rivalry and how that plays out in their lives? I’m kind of guessing they’d never planned to be posing together in a fairly sexy shoot fighting for dominance.

Hung and Hip Hop

Most celebrity men are not that willing to go full frontal in photos or video. Milan Christopher has decided that it’s definitely time for that to change. Milan is known for his time on a U.S. TV show “Love and Hip Hop” and is also a rapper, actor and model.

It would be safe to say that Mr Christopher is not short on confidence and nor is he shy. He took inspiration from Kim Kardashian’s famous “break the internet” PAPER magazine spread and decided he wanted to have his own “break the internet” moment.

While I’m not sure he has the fame to create the same publicity that Kim has, he certainly has the physical attributes to get some good attention. I’m very impressed. Still have no idea what his music is like.

I don’t think so…

This week I’ve been chatting to a bi married guy on Grindr. The banter has been fun but along side the fact that he is cheating on his wife having unsafe sex with guys, his ego was making me very uncomfortable.

Throughout all the chat he kept wanting me to tell him how much I wanted his cock and that he wanted my “faggot mouth” to blow him etc. I’m nobodies faggot or bitch and no man will fuck me in my “cunt” because I don’t have one. I’ve just told him that if he needs to dominate guys and feel like their “alpha” then we aren’t going to catch up and have fun.

I also, maybe stupidly, mentioned that I think even though he’s genuinely bi and in love with his wife, that his bi side scares him and that’s why he feels like he needs to be the dominant one over the guys he fucks. He was surprisingly candid in admitting that might be the case.

It’s equally my insecurities at play here but this had gone past Dom-Sub role play scenario and I’m just not into being a hole for someone to use and I’m never going to beg for a man’s cock. As I told him, I have a lot more access and availability to get my rocks off with guys than he does. He also has a wife and kids to lose if he treats the wrong guy like shit.

I’m cutting that one loose.

Keep on pushing

About two months ago a friend asked me if I wanted to go to a workshop thing that he had signed up for. Unfortunately I couldn’t go on the day that it was on but he assured me the guy running it was planning to do more. In a couple of weeks, I will be going to the next one.

The workshop is called “The Forest” and it is a touch space workshop. The email my friend forwarded to me describes the workshop as follows. “This workshop is not an orgy, it is a personal development workshop. Using fun and play to explore boundaries, consent, sensory deprivation of sight, attraction, pleasure, surrender, generosity and community.”

My friend said it was really helpful in letting down barriers and being open to touch that isn’t necessarily sexual. Apparently people take turns in groups to either stand blindfolded while the other half of the group touches. Then the roles get reversed. It’s not about sexual attraction and groping but being ok with touch.

I’m a very tactile person but I’m also very aware that I like to be in control of that touch. After regaining a little of my sexual mojo in Europe, I’m really interested to see if this workshop can help me further that progress. I’ll keep you all posted.

So tempting

In the past few years I’ve been getting restless. There was a project that I wanted to make happen but unfortunately the sponsorship money proved harder to get than anticipated. It would have meant packing my life up and travelling around Australia for a year, exploring, filming, photographing and really living a very different life to the day-to-day regular grind.

Youtube has some great videos of people pretty much doing that and today I watched the video below. Of course it doesn’t hurt that the guy living this dream life in the video below is spectacularly beautiful and very much my type.

The prospect of leaving an established life behind is pretty daunting and not something I have the money to do at the moment. While I’m sure there would be moments where it was really tough and lonely, being out in the world by yourself forces you to meet new people and do things you wouldn’t normally. Here in Sydney I won’t go to a bar alone or go out to eat alone. On holidays I will because you have to. There’s no point being out in the world but being a hermit.

Imagine all the amazing adventures, big and small that you could have doing this!

No favours at all…

One of the best things about travelling is meeting people from all over the world. Sitting in airports I heard so many different languages and saw so many different nationalities and it made me smile. It’s one of those things that really gives you perspective on the world.

The U.S. does have a reputation for being a bit inward looking and not really being aware of the rest of the world too much. A woman on one of my flights did nothing to shatter that reputation at all. Chatting to the flight attendant she said she’d just been to London, Paris and Greece. When he asked what was her favourite she replied “None. The U.S. is better.” OK then. She went on to say that she prefers ecological travel and those places were all too busy. So why bloody go there if you don’t like big cities? We all know that’s what London and Paris are!

I also heard a story about a Peruvian traveller who said he’d seen everything Barcelona and Berlin had to offer in a day each and there was nothing more to see. I really don’t get why some people travel. If they don’t appreciate all the wonderful things about seeing a new city or country, why leave home? He apparently only ate McDonalds while travelling because he didn’t trust any other food. Don’t they eat Guinea Pigs in Peru? Stay there and create some space in the cool places for those of us that like the challenge of stepping out of our comfort zones.

Some Australians are hideous to see representing our country. Don’t go to Bali expecting to be impressed by the general Australian you see there. It’s baffling to try and work out why people travel with such a narrow minded view of the world.

QAMA is out

Just after I left the country for my holiday the first issue of QAMA Magazine was released and it is available to view on Issu, here.

My photos of Chris are just some of the images included in the magazine but I’m very proud to see that one of them made the cover. Doing an erotic shoot was new to me as I’ve mentioned before but I’m definitely keen to do more, as long as they are still creative and artistic.

Head on over to Issu and check out the full magazine. You may need to create an account but that’s free and I’m pretty sure you’ll enjoy the magazine.

Taking requests

A while back I posted a video from Timo Wilderness about Travelling Near. The idea is that adventures don’t have to be huge global things. Sometimes the best adventures are little ones.

I also pledged to try and do more regular vlogs of little adventures that I have in my own city and nearby. That is still very much my plan but I thought I’d also take requests and suggestions from you, my lovely readers about what you think those adventures could/should be. I will be finding my own adventures as well but is there something you’ve seen or done in Sydney that you think I should vlog about? Or for those of you that haven’t been to Sydney, is there something you’ve heard about you want me to explore?

Keep in mind, these adventures can’t cost me lots of money. The idea is to get me out and about in my own city/region and inspire others to do the same. Most of us are living on limited funds and can’t afford to have big adventures all the time. The adventures should also nudge me out of my comfort zone or be things that I might not have done before.

In the meantime I face the daunting task of editing videos and photos from my month long, much bigger adventure in Europe. Stay tuned!

A nice change

Before I left on my holiday I had been joking with friends that if I can’t get laid in Berlin then I was going to come back to Sydney and put myself down. Berlin is a fantastic city with a certain reputation for it’s sexual availability. Lots of gay bars have back rooms and it just seems like if you want sex, it’s really simple to find it.

On this trip I did actually rediscover my sexual mojo. I’m not going to go into detail about what I did because that’s no one else’s business but mine. Having said that, it was a combination of gay saunas and Grindr that were the conduits for my sexual reawakening. I hadn’t been to a sauna in a few years and the last time it wasn’t a great experience. You definitely have to be in the right headspace to venture into an establishment like that and thankfully, holiday Brenton was in that headspace.

Now I just need to keep that momentum up and not let my preconceptions about the Sydney gay and sex scene get in the way of me having fun, dragging my confidence down. I don’t think it hurts to be a bit slutty at times and I know it does wonders for your perception of the world when you’ve had some quality fun.

JHONATTAN from STUDIOxOITA on Vimeo.