Always a danger

The number of guys that I have photographed is a number I haven’t even tallied up. Every now and then I think about doing the numbers but it’s all a bit daunting and I’m not great with numbers generally. It’s definitely over 100 though. The vast majority of those guys have been great to work with. Many of them I’ve worked with several times.

In the past week or two I’ve been reminded that not all the guys I talk to about shoots are that reliable. One guy I had been talking to literally for months trying to organise something. We’re talking close to a year. A few days before the scheduled shoot, and less than a week after he opened an Onlyfans account with a boner shot, he announces that I won’t be able to use or sell the images and he’s deleted the onlyfans.

Why on earth would I do a shoot that I can’t use, for free? No thank you. Sure, photography is a side hustle or a “hobby job” but I’m not here to satisfy your exhibitionist urges and validate you. Which brings me to the other guy.

Over a few weeks a guy from interstate was talking about visiting and doing an erotic shoot. To the point where it became clear he has some submissive fantasies and would do “whatever you tell me to do”. He was right up for being tied up and fucked on camera which is a rare opportunity for me. He kept talking about this weekend, the long weekend for Australia Day, but somehow never committed to actually coming to town. Sorry guys but I am happy to incorporate your fantasy on camera but I’m not going to endlessly talk about it to get your rocks off in chat if it isn’t ever going to happen.

There is always a danger of this kind of work that people will use it to boost their ego, which is fine if the results are usable. If not, don’t waste my time.

Hurts so good

After a bit of a break over the Christmas and New Year period, last night I started back at circus classes and my god it was tough. It’s the kind of fitness that you lose very quickly when you take a break so after about 6 weeks, hauling my arse off the ground was hard work but very fun and satisfying as usual.

This morning was my second day trialling a new gym. They have some interesting sounding classes so I’m doing those all week to see what I think of the place. Today was the boxing class. Going out on a limb it’s been a good 14-15 years since I have done a boxing class and to say I was a sweaty exhausted mess by the end of it would be a total understatement.

About an hour after finishing the class, after a cold shower and getting to work, I finally stopped sweating and I was STARVING. Clearly getting my heart rate up is the kind of training I need to be doing to burn off all the food I’ve been over eating.

Sadly it doesn’t seem to be the kind of gym to have lots of guys getting changed and showered in the locker room but that’s ok. That’s not why I’m going right?

Thank you!

The bushfires here in Australia will be burning for a while yet but thankfully in some areas they have eased or been extinguished. Sadly their effects will be felt for a long time to come.

So for the last two weeks, ending at midnight last night (Sydney time) I’ve been raising money through the sales of my photography downloads. In those 14 days worth of sales, we have raised $3,060. Now, through my Instagram story I will be taking suggestions of where to donate the money and once I have some good suggestions, I will run a poll to decide how best to split the money.

I’m not a rich man but like a lot of Australians and amazing people all over the world, we have been rocked by this tragedy. This was something I can do to make a contribution.

It also meant that people were buying all sorts of downloads, from the very early ones, to the more recent shoots and all in between. The support has been very exciting and a bit humbling. Thank you!

Forced changes

Sometimes things change and it’s beyond your control. That can be a good thing or a bad thing. Or it can be a good opportunity to reevaluate what you’ve been doing or what you want to do.

On Wednesday morning I got up at 5:30 as I usually do and walked the 2.5km (1.5 miles) to the gym only to find the regular crew standing outside. At first I thought someone had just slept in and the gym just hadn’t been opened up yet, but no, it was worse. The gym had gone into administration and was shut down. I had known the owner was looking for a buyer but clearly that hadn’t worked out.

So the hunt is on for a new gym. This morning I did a trial session at a relatively new gym 10-15 minutes walk from my home but that is not the gym for me. After a gym with a really good community vibe and a great set up for the kind of workout I do, this place had no soul, the machines were bad and there was just no room to do anything. After some research into other gyms in the area I will be doing some trial sessions at a couple of them before I commit to anything longer-term. It might be strange to some but I have actually missed having a locker room at the gym. The one I’ve been going to only had two or three individual change room/shower setups. I’ve always enjoyed the locker room vibe after a workout. Getting undressed and having a shower with others around. It’s not (just) being able to see other gym guys getting changed, it also means I don’t have to get the train to work all sweaty either.

Let’s see what I can find. If I find a good gym with a good locker room (and dare I wish for communal showers?) then I’ll be a happy man.

Too soon?

It’s only been four months since my big European adventure ended although it feels like a million years in some ways. This year I’m planning an adventure within Australia in the middle of the year. It’s just a matter of confirming the availability of some of the guys going.

But my mind is already thinking further into the future. It’s no secret that I like to have something to look forward to when it comes to holidays or adventures. The only trouble is that there are so many places to see in this world and I am not rich enough to stop working and go and see them all. Hardly seems fair in my opinion.

Do I finally go and see South America? Or is it time to check out the wilds of Africa on a safari and see if I’m lucky enough to see the big 5 and all the other gorgeous creatures there? Europe will always hold a fascination and a piece of my heart. Maybe it’s a Finland, Norway, Sweden adventure?

Then there are the options of tours? I discovered a group called Puckett Excursions a few months ago and they do tours to all sorts of places and it looks like it’s generally for gay men who are more into adventure than circuit parties. Some of the places they go look incredible.

Obviously I have tonnes of time to work all this out. I’ll be focusing on this year’s Aussie adventure first, but all the possibilities are tantalising.

Who is in control?

After reconnecting with someone I hadn’t been in touch with for over a year, today we started chatting on Facebook and he told me he was six months out of a very toxic relationship that he had been in when we caught up last.

I’ve never quite understood people that need to be controlling in their relationships but I’ve seen it happen. The natural assumption is that the controlling person is deeply insecure and has to control everything their partner does and demean them to lower their self esteem so they don’t leave.

This guy’s boyfriend had his email password and decided to shut the email down so the guy I know lost all his emails and contacts in it. An escort I knew a long time ago had been introduced to escorting by his boyfriend who was also an escort but then the boyfriend was insanely jealous and wouldn’t let him go to the nude beach just in case someone “stole him”. That is some seriously messed up psychology.

Thankfully the guy I was talking to today is now happy and healthy and enjoying being out of the destructive relationship he was in for a few years. We are planning on getting him back in front of my camera and I can’t wait.

What’s going on?

Does anyone else have those moments where you just wonder what is going on in your life? With all the different things I do in my life from my day-to-day job, to circus, to photography, to weddings and all the different friends in my life, every now and then I notice that things can be a bit contradictory.

There is a guy from Melbourne who is keen to model for me and is happy to go full on erotic/sexual. He’s also a bit of a submissive so is completely open to the idea of being tied up, blindfolded and then letting the other model have his way with him. So I floated the idea of a bondage dungeon setting. Today I messaged someone, and one of the few people I know who might have a lead on that sort of thing, asking if he knew about one I could shoot in.

Shortly after that conversation I left work so that I could meet another friend for dinner. That friend? A Catholic Priest. Who would have thought you could go from researching a bondage dungeon to chatting over dinner with a priest?

I have to say, it’s that kind of diverse interaction that really keeps life interesting and forces you to keep your mind open. I love it.

It’s a Contrast!

I’ve released the next download a week early to try and keep momentum up raising money for the bushfires here in Australia. At the moment we’ve raised over $1,800 from sales of downloads and I’m hoping that with this new download, CONTRAST we can at least go past $2,000.

These two guys had both been in front of my camera before separately but they also knew each other independently of me so they pitched the idea of working together. Of course I jumped at the chance. I’m not an idiot.

There were two parts to this shoot and the other part will be released in a future download in weeks to come. For this one we just played on the contrast between their two skin tones. Chris really is that pale and Shon obviously has dark skin. They worked beautifully against each other. By that I mean their skin tone as well as their two beautiful bodies up against each other.

There are lots of beautiful images in this download with some full frontal images in there for those of you that require it. Please click here and go on a download shopping spree. I’m donating 100% of all sales til the end January 18 to the bushfire cause. Australia is hurting and we need to do what we can.

What a week

It’s been up and it’s been down. The first week back at work of the new year has been a ride. The work aspect of it has actually been fine. Not busy enough to make the days fly by but good to see some of my work colleagues. Like most work places, some people I can do without and we’ll never be close.

Sadly the fires are still raging across Australia and are setting all the wrong kind of records. Our Prime Minister is still being useless and is now (unintentionally) insulting people along the way. He apparently spent $180,000 on an empathy coach a little while back. Sadly that seems to have amounted to nothing.

Thankfully sales of my downloads have been going well and we are well over $1,500 now. I know that isn’t a huge amount but it really does feel good to be able to contribute even that little bit. These fires are absolutely devastating. I will be releasing the next download this Sunday, a week early to try and keep the momentum going.

In other very sweet news it was my parents’ 50th wedding anniversary yesterday. It’s a weird thought that at my age even if I met someone tomorrow and we got married relatively quickly I have almost no chance of attaining that milestone. My parents are still my gold standard for relationships. Is it perfect? No, of course not but I would say it’s about as healthy a relationship as you can see. They communicate well, they put each other first and they are a team. A team that still holds hands.

Tomorrow, after a workout and a photo shoot, I’m off to Wollongong to catch up with some old school friends that are still good friends which will be nice. It also means I get some chilled time with my parents. I’m looking forward to it.

See you!

It’s actually been quite a while since I’ve had a troll in my life. Sure, if I make the mistake of engaging in political talk on twitter or facebook that definitely opens up the floodgates for some pretty awful behaviour but it’s been ages since this blog has had some trolling.

There was a time early on in the days of the blog that one particular guy kept trolling and being vicious and nasty. He even posted a couple of times using different names to agree with himself but each comment came through from the same IP address. Like most trolls, he wasn’t very smart.

The recent one was on on the Facebook page for this blog. He kept being nasty about how pathetic and single I was and how I whined about being single. He went quiet for a few weeks but today he reared his anonymous head. I hadn’t worked out how to block him from the page before but now that is sorted right out.

I had actually asked him nicely to message me privately and have a rational conversation about why he hated me and felt the need to troll but not surprisingly, he didn’t take up that offer. Can’t imagine why. Asshole. Blocking is so much easier than engaging.

Just like that

For two weeks I’ve been enjoying the lazy days of the festive season without a thought of work. There have only been two beach days in that time but there have been many drinks shared with good friends, lazy days on the lounge and too much delicious food.

Now, just like that, the holiday is over. Today was my first day back in the office and it went so slowly it was painful. At this time of year there isn’t enough work to make the days go quickly but in the near future that is all set to change.

Until it does I’ll have to make sure I occupy my time somehow. I’ve got a conversation with my boss tentatively scheduled to discuss making better use of my skills and my time and increasing my value to the business. Let’s see what happens.

Daniel for a Cause

I’ve just released a new download called “DANIEL”. Daniel was a novice who had only done one photo shoot before and never done a nude. He’d also only been to one nude beach in his life. He takes the fake it till you make it approach and stripped off as soon as we hit the beach, revelling in his freedom.

To coincide with the release of DANIEL, I’m announcing that starting with today’s sales, all proceeds from sales of ALL DOWNLOADS over the next two weeks will go to the Rural Fire Service. These amazing people have been battling the largest fires seen in Australian history. If you took the line of the fire fronts and straightened it out it would reach from here to Argentina. Millions of Acres are devastated, countless animals have died and 8 people have lost their lives.

Please click here and go on a download buying frenzy. Remember proceeds of ALL downloads sold will go to the RFS. That’s $9.95 each. It’s not a lot but it will help.

Welcome to 2020

Happy New Year to all my lovely readers. I have no idea how many of you there are these days but I don’t care.

2019 was a bit of a wild one. Some of my friends had absolutely horrible years but I was lucky enough to have a pretty good year with a trip to Europe, some great family time, fantastic friends and lots of laughs.

I’m not a huge “New Year’s Resolution” kind of guy but I’m setting myself some goals for the year and hoping I can achieve them.

Thank you for supporting me and I hope you all have a great 2020.

Arthouse skinema

Two of my friends are good at hunting down interesting cinema and events to go to. I love the idea of seeing art house cinema etc but never seem to manage the time to go to the films or galleries etc.

Yesterday we went to see a new Pedro Almodovar film “Pain and Glory” starring Almodovar’s favourite Antonio Banderas. It was a beautiful film telling the story of Banderas’ character’s life and how he ended up where he is. In one of the flashbacks to his childhood we get to see the family’s painter washing up after he’s been doing some painting and tiling in their home.

The painter/handyman is played by Cesar Vicente and he is one of those gorgeous staples of Arthouse cinema. He has delicious lips, deep brown eyes you could get lost in, a lean athletic body and he’s not afraid to get nude. As usual in European cinema and especially Almodovar’s films, the nudity is sensual and beautiful without being gratuitous.

Cesar is a bit of a mystery according to wikipedia. I think he is around 21 years old and I presume Spanish but that’s about all I know. I highly recommend the film if arthouse is your thing.

Time to evaluate

In some ways it feels logical to use the new year as a bit of an opportunity to re-evaluate and re-set things that might need some tweaking in life. In other ways it feels kind of arbitrary to use the first of January to do that. There are 364 other days a year that we can make changes for the better.

With this New Year’s being the start of the 20’s, a new decade people are asking what goals I have for the next decade. To be fair, I’m finding the thought of planning and goal setting for that far in advance a bit daunting but at least it is getting the gears turning in my brain.

In February it will be 10 years since I met some great friends of mine who coincidentally are coming from interstate to visit me tomorrow for a few days. One of those two guys is the guy that held me accountable and made me commit to a deadline to open my first gallery exhibition. That exhibition was called Shrouded and was an amazing thing to do.

Given this is the time to be challenging myself and setting goals I’m using 2020 as my time to shoot images and work towards my next gallery show. I want to open it on the tenth anniversary of my first one which means on 1st of February 2021 I will be opening a gallery show. First task, work out a theme/concept for the damn thing.

Below is the video trailer I did for my second exhibition called “Freedom”. Fingers crossed my filming and editing skills have improved.