Author Archive for Brenton

It’s perfectly appropriate!

A reader in London and I have been emailing backwards and forwards. It was him that let me know about the New Docklands Steam Bath that I posted about recently and he’s been helping me find possible places for naked relaxation in my one day in London in June. He’s a nudist as well and we’ve been chatting about our nude experiences.

Today we were discussing gym routines and working out etc. He told me that once in a swimming pool locker room he was showering in the communal showers, naked as you do, and then walked to his locker nude. A man who was there with two sons told him it was inappropriate to shower nude and not to cover himself with a towel between the shower and the locker. Um… isn’t a locker room the most appropriate place to be nude? In fact, in all showers isn’t it appropriate to be nude? I struggle with the idea of NOT being nude under the showers at most public (clothed) beaches.

I can fully understand people not being comfortable with being nude themselves but to expect everyone else to cover up because you are shy is ludicrous. What message is that guy sending to his sons?

Who knows why?

There are some very strange things posted online on a very regular basis. Neil Curtis has done several bodypaint videos but this is more of a conceptual music video using the male nude as a starting point. Instead of bodypaint he’s using mud and movement to tell a story. What that story is I have no idea. If you are going to direct a bonkers performance art music video, why not do it to Bjork? She is the high priestess of bonkers after all.

The guy in this video has a sexy body and isn’t shy. As with all of Neil’s models, he’s completely shaved which I understand for body paint but I wouldn’t have thought it as necessary for thick mud. Enjoy.

Björk "Stonemilker" directed by Neil Curtis from Neil Curtis on Vimeo.

How about NO?

Social media is a funny mistress. We all put so much importance on whether someone has unfriended us or not, or how many friends we have. A friend was recently quite put out by someone unfriending him on facebook even though he said he wasn’t. In reality they never hang out and never chat so why the fuss?

Today I had a friend request from someone that I’d deleted a couple of years ago for my own sanity. Anyone that has been reading the blog from the start might remember I was involved with an American guy long distance and it didn’t end well. He was the starting point of me losing all my self confidence around sex. We all know that once foundations become shaky then it’s very easy for things to crumble which is what happened to my confidence. We stayed in touch for a while after the dramatic end to our dalliance. After a few years of being friends on facebook but not being in touch I realised I didn’t need those occasional updates to surprise me out of the blue anymore so I deleted him.

As a result, we haven’t been in touch for a few years and while he is a nice guy and there was no malicious intent to what happened, it happened and I’m a bit broken because of it. So there is no need to make polite chit chat over social media across the Pacific Ocean and for me to hear how easily he moved on and did indeed end up happily in a relationship that he told me he wasn’t ready for.

The last few days I’ve been very blue in general and specifically about my single status. Sometimes no matter how many great friends you have and how busy you are, that missing someone special can feel like much more of a hole than it really deserves to. Maybe seeing a request from Mike was a wake up call to try and truly let all that go.

Another challenger joins in!

Dermott has joined in the Fitness Challenge. In just a few days he’ll be sending his update shots but these are his “before” shots. I’m hoping that this challenges keeps everyone inspired and motivated.

From what I understand Dermott has already lost some weight and is on track to keep that weight loss going while putting on a bit of muscle. Well done Dermott on joining in! Let’s all make some changes!

Because dick flashing is totally FASHION!

Apparently there is a fashion designer called Rick Owens and according to Mr Owens putting male models in drapey blankets with holes in the crotch or so short their junk is on display is called fashion. I’m no prude but this is clearly just a grab for attention. None of the “clothing” is actually wearable or even remotely stylish. It’s certainly worked as a publicity stunt because this story was all over the internet a few days ago but I forgot to blog about it before now.

None of his models are my type either. They all look a bit like unwashed anemic protestors. If you are going to do balls out on the runway do it well. Karl Largerfeld’s male muse Brad Kroenig has walked the runway nude with a surfboard along side another model and I’m pretty sure Tom of Finland fashion has sent models down the runway with not a lot of modesty.¬† So I’m thinking Rick Owens needs to do a bit better. Congratulations to the models though for being bold enough to do it.

Modelicious Cole Monahan

There aren’t many guys that can carry off long hair and look good, but the sharp jawed Cole Monahan certainly can. The Tennessee native has recently signed with Elite Model Agency which almost guarantees a level of success in the industry. Cole is a 6’2″ blue eyed country boy growing up on a farm in Tennessee which has apparently given him a good work ethic to propel him in modeling.

He came to my attention on Instagram a while ago which is where all the hot men seem to be found. According to his facebook he is in a relationship but there are no details on the gender of his partner so forgive me if I just project my desire and pretend it’s a guy that looks just like me. Sadly I think I’m completely mistaken.

Cole has done some great shoots with people like Scott Teitler baring his perky fuzzy butt in a Ice Hockey Locker Room shoot as well as wearing some seriously cool fashion in other shoots. The tousled curly long hair just making him look even more adorable especially combined with his cheeky grin. I’ve always been and always will be a sucker for a cheeky grin and sparkly eyes.

Now showing!

Last night in Melbourne the group exhibition Company of Men opened to large crowds and for at least one of the 21 artists, lots of sales. Sadly that wasn’t me. There are a very diverse range of artists with painting, prints, photography and some 3D artwork on display all featuring male flesh and sexuality as their theme. The lovely and raunchy Rogan Richards did another wild performance in “The Pit” at the gallery.

Unfortunately I am in Sydney so couldn’t be there but my works are up on the walls featuring the lovely Greg and Kane who let me throw a sheet and water all over them. When you present work for viewing you have to tell people what your inspiration was and what you are trying to say. Quite often I have no idea. With my Shrouded exhibition I didn’t really realise that I was exploring my insecurities with hiding behind things until I was about half way through the series. When it came to working out what I was trying to say with this series of six images once again it wasn’t immediately obvious.

The statement that I sent with these images was this. “A lot of my previous work has explored the face that we present to the rest of the world and how we hide our own insecurities or flaws behind a kind of mask to go through life. With this series I wanted to flip that and explore the perceptions from the outside of a relationship and the assumptions we make about people’s relationships and how they live within them. By hiding a couple underneath a wet sheet we get a distorted view of what’s happening in the sheets without really knowing. Unless both people (or all the people) in a relationship tell you how their sex life is run, then are only working on assumptions or your perception of it from the outside.

Company of Men runs at Brightspace Gallery, St Kilda until February 7.

January Gymspiration

Working out at the gym without a gym partner is taking some getting used to but it’s not actually the working out that has been a problem for me. I’m finding it tough to motivate myself to go without someone waiting for me but so far I’m doing it at least three times a week, usually four. Now that I’ve committed to the fitness challenge I need to stick to it. With the challenge and the prospect of sailing nude through Croatia, the motivation is there. I’ve also committed to doing a routine at the circus school end of term show and it will be the first solo in over three years so I need to make sure I’m strong enough and fit enough to do it.

With all that in mind, today I went up to the sports store near work and bought a skipping rope so that I can start with 5-10 minutes of skipping at the end of a workout each day. Getting on a treadmill just isn’t happening at the moment but I don’t mind skipping every now and then so skipping it is, just more often.

When I weighed myself a couple of days ago I wasn’t happy with the number that popped up on the screen. With nights out over Christmas and New Years and pub meals / beers with friends I’ve put on about half a kilo which isn’t what I want. Training harder with weights I may have put on a little bit of muscle but there is still some soft “insulation” that needs to go.

For myself, Barak and Sean, and anyone else that wants to join us in the Fitness Challenge, here are some naked hotties with beautiful bodies to serve as gymspiration.

So very true

Especially after last night’s Scruff standup, this video about people’s behaviour on Grindr etc is spot on. All the complete bullshit that people put in their profiles is called out. Masculine, of course (not). I’ve never quite understood lying on a profile like that. Surely when someone meets you expecting one thing, when you turn out to be completely different do you expect them to still sleep with you?

Never fail to disappoint.

Tonight I’ve had my faith in mens ability to disappoint reaffirmed. Whether it’s a Sydney thing, a gay thing or just a men thing is open for discussion but I can only really speak of the Sydney dating scene and what I would say is not complimentary.

I was chatting to a guy over the last week on Scruff. He had a nice profile with a lot of interests and a couple of lines that made me laugh. People that make me laugh have so much more going for them than someone with a million instagram likes on their selfie. We organised a few days ago to meet tonight for a drink. I tried to confirm on Scruff yesterday and again today but he was offline and no trace of being online. An hour before the time we were supposed to meet I said to a friend that I thought I was being stood up. Sure enough, Mr Scruff has not been seen tonight.

Are people really that deluded that they believe that by writing “down to earth” or “I don’t play games” on their profile that it makes it fact? We’ve all come across guys whose profile clearly is all a big fat lie. They say they are masculine when really they are camp. They say they are down to earth when they are really a typical scene game player. What are they trying to achieve?

Maybe dating and relationships are just a thing meant for other people.

Even we don’t like the messages we get!

Dear lord, sometimes as a collective we gays wonder why people don’t take us seriously or are grossed out by what they think we do in bed. This video, while not as funny as the women reading grindr messages, really highlights just how random some guys are on the apps and how even guys with the most out there fetishes have no fear of putting it all out there. I guess behind the relative anonymity of a phone screen you can put it out there and if someone takes the bait, then why not? A friend of mine who is in a monogamous relationship has grindr on his phone when he travels for work. He showed me his profile, there is no photo and no information. He uses it just to be a bit of an observer. People message him hitting him up for sex. WTF? I cannot understand the complete lack of self respect you must have to hit someone up for sex when you have no idea of any facet of their existence. None.

Watching these guys react to some of these messages is funny, mostly because we’ve all had messages like these.

Lightning strikes at AussieBum!

I’ve always really liked aussieBum and we all know that. I’ve posted about them plenty of times over the years. They’ve just released their “Lightning” range of underwear featuring some cool checked patterns in different colours. It comes in briefs, hipster briefs and LONG JOHNS!!!! I’ve always known that¬†aussieBum would do long johns well when they did them and they haven’t disappointed. There are other companies doing long johns and I’ve bought a couple of them for Burning Man but they were ludicrously low in the hips and overtly “pouchy” which I’m not fussed on.

The lightning long johns look seriously comfy to potter around the house in when it’s cold outside. I’d even be tempted to give them a run at circus class if I thought I wouldn’t ruin them.

Lightning from aussieBum on Vimeo.

Sean is joining in!

This morning in my inbox there was an email from Sean who is going to take part in the Fitness Challenge. He used to live in Queensland Australia but now lives in Manchester England. Sean wants to lose about 10kg which is a very achievable goal in the four months or so of the challenge. Good luck Sean!

Barak is up for the challenge!

Last week I posted about the fitness challenge. It is partly to motivate myself and partly to help others find some inspiration. The first person to take up the challenge is Barak who lost 20lb a couple of years ago and who is now looking to bulk up with muscle using a personal trainer and healthy eating. Good on you Barak! Thanks for joining in.

So far it’s just Barak and myself but I think we need some others to join in! If you want to be a part of it, send in your “before” photos as soon as you can.

It’s all good

Matthew Bomer took out the Best Supporting Actor for his role in The Normal Heart at the Golden Globes recently and in his acceptance speech he thanked his husband and children, using the words “my husband”. Now the performing arts have always been filled with LGBT people but there is still a lot of fear amongst some closeted actors that if their sexuality is revealed it will ruin their careers. For some it would become a Mission Impossible (cough cough). So for Matthew to be so public about his sexuality and for it to not even gain one negative article (from what I’ve seen) is a huge sign that we are getting there.

The fact that movies like The Normal Heart are being made and made well is a sign that we’ve come a long way. Back when the movie Philadelphia was made in 1993 it was a brave movie. At the time it got some criticism for the complete lack of affection shown between the lead characters, a gay couple. The criticism these days would be overwhelming and probably ruin the movie’s chance at success. The same criticisms have been leveled Modern Family’s lack of affection between Cam and Mitch.

There is a fantastic array of LGBT people who are openly gay in Hollywood these days pushing boundaries with sexuality and equality. For me, it’s the wholesome clean cut guys like Matthew Bomer that are going to make things more “palatable” for the conservative masses. The amazing drag queens, trans men and women and in your face queens that rioted at Stonewall have been the warriors who’ve broken down walls and fought hard for rights but it’s so easy for the conservatives to dismiss the more flamboyant characters in our community because they can’t relate to them. Guys like Bomer and women like Ellen Degeneres who aren’t confronting and middle America can imagine sitting at their dinner table are a valuable part of the equation too. Middle American mothers might even be able to picture their gay son bringing someone like Matt Bomer home for Thanksgiving. I’ll picture him doing other things.