Damon is the father of Tom (names have been changed for privacy reasons) whom I interviewed a couple of weeks ago. Tom was shown this blog by a nudist mate when I posted a video that raised concerns about nudity and legal age a few months ago. He then showed his father the blog and the video and they have been in regular contact since.
You are bringing your boys up in a very open minded, some would say alternative, household. Were you brought up in a nudist, liberal house or a more traditional and conservative household?
I was brought up in a traditional conservative household. I have two sisters and I am in the middle. I never saw either of my parents or my sisters naked to my recollection. But ever since I can remember, I have had an intense primal desire to be nude. My father told me that I would always be ripping my clothes off when I was a toddler. But I first discovered nude freedom at summer camp when I was around seven or eight. It was an all boys camp in those days, and pretty much clothing optional, much to my mother’s chagrin as it turned out. It was there I discovered that lots of boys slept nude, not only at camp but at home, and lots of boys did not wear underwear at times and some not at all. The camp was a great experience for me for many reasons – nudity included. I started sleeping naked year-round and often dispensed with underwear. My mother still dutifully bought pajamas and underwear for me. Would put on the pjs to go to breakfast but did not wear them otherwise.
I returned to that camp every year until I was about twenty – and as a counselor myself the last four years, after I turned 17, so I was quite fortunate to live nude a good part of every summer. When it came time for college, I was determined to live as nude as possible, and with some research, found a college within the state with a liberal reputation with a well-regarded pre-law program, I wished to pursue. And I was fortunate to receive a full swimming college to this institution, the same one where my oldest son is now a student as well as on the swim team. Lots of stories to tell here, but suffice to say, was able to live nude to the extent possible from day one in college and have lived that way ever since.
Your wife knew you were gay when you got married. What made you want to marry a woman if you knew your sexuality lay elsewhere?
She was my soulmate and still is in many respects – we loved each other very much and still do. We lak every day and see each other at least weekly. I always knew I wanted to have a family and thought I could somehow make it all work I was wrong but have no regrets – I did what I was thought was right and good at the time and I know she has no regrets as well.
By the way, she is not and never has been a nudist but always accepting and supportive of our nudity.
Explain the idea behind living in a house where you share bunk style room with your boys, your partner, you all live nude, shower together and have few boundaries?
Our sleeping arrangement is quite unorthodox these days but until recent times was quite common. Private sleeping quarters was a luxury for the rich – it was common for families to sleep together and still quite common in much of the world.
When I separated and divorced – my wife and I agreed to the boys were to remain with me. At the time, we were living in a large suburban home with the usual multiple bedrooms and baths. The boys were about two, six and nine at the time. But every night, the boys would come into my room and we would all sleep together in the king size bed. I knew I did not want to stay in that house and built a smaller, enery efficient two bedroom with an additional sleeping loft. But even there the boys wanted us to all sleep together. And I had always told them stories about the quad room I shared in college and how it was a very positive experience for me – they wanted to live as I did in college.
So I set up the bunk arrangement in bedroom with two bunks – a double bed on bottom of each one and a single on top. The extra bedroom became my home office so I was able to work from home – with a futon there should I have had overnight t guests or boyfriend over. The loft became the boys’ study space. And I should add, in warm weather we all sleep outdoors on the screened back porch – nothing like it.
My partner and I are only recently together and he is the first man I have lived with. He started moving in about a month ago and my younger sons are living mostly with their mother during this transition time. He does massage part time and we are adding an extra room that will be his studio as well as our private sleeping space.
Our bath is an open bath with two shower heads. In camp I learned I had no need for personal privacy of modesty in the bath and that is how my sons have been raised (and they all went to same camp for a while as well).
How did you explain to your boys about your sexuality and how did they react?
Never had a need to explain really – they were quite young at the time and my best friend was gay. He and his partner were over the house all the time. Believe I told them I was just like Mark and Mike – it was that simple.
One of your boys appeared on a nudist blog, photographed in the World Naked Bike Ride. He’s under age, what was your initial reaction to that?
I was not surprised really – I figured someone would be taking pictures and was relieved the picture that did appear on the web was discrete.
Were there any reservations on your part about letting him take part?
Actually no – it is for a cause that is most important to us and it was an affirmation of the way we live. They were thrilled to be part of it and we look forward to doing it again this year.
When your boys make new friends, do you make an effort to talk to their parents to explain your lifestyle so that they aren’t caught unawares and how do they generally react?
Almost all their friends are from the private school they attend – a fairly liberal school, some may describe as alternative. That said, academic and discipline standards are quite rigorous. It is a small school and were are all well known – I am on the board as well. Everyone is well aware of our living naked. And I might add, many parents tell me they always saw nudists as a strange bunch until they actually met me lol !!
If your sons have friends over, do the friends typically join in the nudist arrangement when they stay?
Almost all do, assuming they have their parent’s permission, after I speak with them. I do not let them do so otherwise.
Do you think society will return to a more liberal or innocent attitude towards nudity, like the YMCA’s in the 60′s and 70′s for example? Or are we doomed to have lost that freedom forever?
I would hope that freedom may return. Social and cultural trends always change and the current level of modesty and prudery is bound to change and loosen at some point. But when is anyone’s guess !
Raising your boys in such an open environment would it sadden you to see them take up a more textile lifestyle?
Whatever choice they make – I want it to be however they are most happy and comfortable – naked or textiled. They have always had the choice to be clothed at home and tell them that – I have no qualms whatsoever if they were to choose to do so.
My partner wasn’t a nudist before we met but took to it right away as we started to date. I told him moving in, clothes at home were not an option for either one of us. The boys live in a textile world outside the home – we set the example by living naked and giving them that freedom to do so.
As a father you obviously take photos of your family. How do you ensure those photos aren’t going to be posted anywhere less than suitable? For instance, if the photo of your son in the World Naked Bike Ride had ended up somewhere with a sexual overtone, what would your reaction be?
I maintain strict control over pics I take and do not allow the boys to take pics of each other or their friends naked. I monitor their computer and social media usage and check their phone usage as well. They know the consequences if they do something not appropriate – living nude does not in anyway relax standards for manners and appropriate personal behavior.
Do you have anything you would like to say to the readers of Aussielicious?
With an introduction by Brenton,, would be happy to meet and chat with other nudist dads – know you are out there !!
