A few weeks ago I went on what I thought was a second date. It turns out it wasn’t. The guy didn’t feel a spark and he thought he’d given me the impression that it was just a mates catching up kind of scenario. I really liked the guy and was interested to see if it would go anywhere. Clearly I found out sooner than anticipated.
I actually dreaded telling friends that there had been yet another dating disaster. Whenever I have to tell coupled up friends that I am shit out of luck once again, I find myself bracing myself before I do. There are all the comments that mean they love you and want you to be happy but they don’t really help. “Why can’t these guys see what a catch you are?” Maybe I’m just not that much of a catch. Most likely it just wasn’t a match. It’s hardly unheard of to have a one sided attraction.
It’s the “It’ll happen when you stop looking” that I struggle with the most. My life is busy and fun. Sure there are a lot of things I would love to share with someone but I’m not out there stalking and hunting guys down. Right now it actually feels like I’m becoming used to the idea that it just may not be in my future. If it is fantastic. A romantic like me would love it to be, but I am quite used to being single and the freedom that it brings with it.
Intimacy would be fantastic though. On the weekend I did get to have some great non-sexual, fully clothed cuddles with a dear friend just snuggled on the lounge. It was a very content feeling.