That’s what friends are for.

There are times in life when you need to have some difficult conversations with dear friends but those conversations are necessary and often good for you. This weekend I was out in the country with friends and we had some very big chats. I’d kind of anticipated them coming but it still didn’t make it any easier. This friend is a very dear friend of I think 16 years now and we have been able to have these conversations pulling each other up on some behaviour over the years when necessary, clear the air and move on.

Like all friends we have gone through phases where we haven’t seen each other as much as other times but I have no doubt we are stuck with each other as friends for decades to come and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Obviously I’m not going to share anything that I said to him but I am going to mention something he said to me. He reads this blog from time to time and he mentioned that lately, while there are some great posts they are scattered amongst a lot of posts where I seem to be writing more of a glass half empty point of view. He’s right. There have been a lot of times in the past 3-6 months where I’ve felt flat. There was a lot of stress around moving house. There is a period of adjustment to a new job and there is a bit of (self inflicted) pressure and stress in releasing a photographic download every week.

A few years back I was posting what I called a “Mining the clouds” post from time to time. These were posts where I looked for the silver lining in a situation and wrote about it. I think it’s time to bring that concept back. Maybe not naming the posts like that but keeping that attitude towards posting. I have no intention of faking a happiness that may not be there but I’m going to make a concerted effort to be a glass half full guy.

This is what friends are for.

Getting some fresh air

Starting a new job at the beginning of the year, saving all my holiday leave for next year and trying to maintain a schedule of shooting and releasing a download every weekend as well as doing weddings and maintaining a social life means that as we hit the home stretch of the year, I’m dying for a bit of a break.

So tomorrow night (Friday night) I’m jumping in my car and heading out to my friends’ property a few hours out of town. I will be helping with some jobs around the property while they get ready for their wedding on the property but it won’t be too strenuous and it will be a complete change of pace. There will be an abundance of fresh air and wide open space.

The boys have their own jacuzzi next to their house but they rent the “main” house out so I don’t know how much opportunity there will be for cheeky nude selfies this time but there will be some naked soaking with a drink catching up with my mate. Last time I was there I got cheeky on the sign at the front fence of the property. There’s a good chance of more photos like that, as we know I do love a nude selfie.

I’m also taking my drone out there. I’ve owned it for 6 months and never used it so it’s time to fly it and see how it goes. Lets see if I can get some good images with it and not crash it!

The heavy lifting

Do you remember at school when you had to do a group project there was always one person who did just about nothing? At work at the moment I’m part of a group working on a submission to a competition and while I know we have been busy and no one has had a lot of time, I am the only person that had brought anything to the table at all until today.

We have had a month to work on this project and we have three days left to submit and today was the first day anyone else has contributed anything.

I read a story online recently about a college situation like this where one of the girls in the group of people at university just sat on her phone texting her boyfriend when the rest of the group was working on the assignment. So as payback for doing nothing they un-shared the google drive with her for the assignment, leaving her stranded. She failed the assignment which seems perfectly fair to me if she’d done nothing.

In the situation I’m in the other people in the group admit they’ve done nothing and it’s all fine but there is one person who I don’t trust not to try and throw me and the others under the bus. She won’t get away with it but it will be interesting to see her try.

Get Shrouded

This week’s download is a flash back to 7.5 years ago when I had my first gallery exhibition, Shrouded. I’d released the other two exhibitions as downloads and I thought it was time to release this one. The cover image of Brad was taken nearly nine years ago and pretty much was the start of what has become a bit of a style with me, draping, obscuring, covering models in something. My lighting knowledge has come a long way but there is something that I still really love about this image.

The rest of the images are a nostalgic trip for me too. I remember covering poor Chris in charcoal powder not realising it was going to stain his skin for three days, Matteo being so patient while I covered him in powder and all the other memories that come with revisiting older work.

If you want to buy your copy of the download Shrouded, or any of the other downloads then click here and visit my online shop.

It takes two

There has been a lot of discussion around relationships amongst my friends lately. A friend has broken up with her boyfriend of a couple of years and is now with someone else. Another couple of mates went on a holiday separately to give them both space to work a few things out and another friend is struggling to know where he stands in a relatively new situation.

The friend that has found herself a new man after ending a previous relationship just needed to cut her losses in the other relationship. They’d been together a couple of years and while she had known him for a decade longer than the relationship, it wasn’t healthy and he wasn’t making any effort. Instead he was draining her emotionally.

The two guys that holidayed separately have come back together and are doing really well. It helped them see what they stood to lose and work out what wasn’t making them happy. As for the guy that doesn’t know where he stands, I just don’t know what to do. I have a feeling he’s going to be hurt, not so much through the other guy doing anything wrong but I just don’t know that they are on the same page at the same time.

Chatting to a mate I haven’t seen in a while at the nude drinks last night, once again relationships came up. Now this friend is pretty fiercely independent and while not determined to be single, he is determined that a relationship is going to be right if it is going to happen. We both commented that there are too many people in relationships that aren’t happy but they’d rather be in a relationship than single, so they stay.

I am clearly no expert in the dating game and I have no answers for anyone but I know that if you aren’t happy then it needs to be fixed or abandoned.

It makes me wonder

Everyone has slightly different fetishes or things that turn them on and I would almost say that one of mine is hearing about other peoples. It’s always turned me on to see other people turned on. There are things that I would never do and things that I just do not understand how people find them sexy but by and large there is no judgement.

Tonight I saw a profile which did make me wonder, as others have, what is it about them that has led them to this? It was a young 21 year old whose profile says he’s into daddies and that he’s looking for “Burly bearded daddies” and “Being a lil’ sub bitch.” I recently posted about a question a friend had raised and maybe this guy could answer his version of the question.

I once went on a couple of dates with a guy about 12 years younger than me. That is definitely a bigger age difference than I would normally consider and after the couple of dates I did think that kind of age difference is not for me. Every single one of this guy’s boyfriends had been 15 or so years older and it did turn out he’d never had a good relationship with his father. I am definitely not saying that’s the case with all the guys into “daddies” older than them but I’d be very interested in chatting about what it is about the sub bitch/daddy dynamic that he likes.

Just because we can

As we all know I’m quite a fan of being nude. That comes as no surprise to anyone. I’ve just had dinner with a mate and we were talking about how liberating, comfortable and just good for the soul we both think it is to be nude amongst other nude people. Last summer I went on a hike with the Get Naked Australia gang and it was a great day. I was definitely one of the older people there which is unusual in the nude world and there were also as many women as there were men. Once again unusual, but refreshing.

On Friday night my nude mates and I are having one of our nude drinks nights at a mate’s place. People that aren’t into it can’t understand how it’s not a sexual thing but they aren’t. It’s just mates catching up, having a laugh, maybe playing beer pong or something silly and just relaxing nude.

How many of my readers are actually nudists too or are most of you just here for the photos?

VIKING – they are real!

There are some models that you almost have to shoot in a certain way. I was introduced to James through another photographer friend and it’s taken us a few months to get the shoot done. When we were chatting he commented that he really liked the Tribal series I’d done and wanted to do something like that. Now James does love a bit of Cosplay and I had to keep steering him away from anything too much like a “costume” and be a bit less literal with it. In the end we were both on the same page and we got him all kitted out like a nude viking.

Sometimes you can feel a photo shoot isn’t going very well and it feels sluggish and just not comfortable at all. Then there are moments when you can feel the energy working and everything is going great. That’s how it went when I got this shot of Timothy¬†and that’s how it went with James for this shoot. At one stage he was down low almost crawling across the floor of the studio, the next he was flipping his hair around looking like he was in battle. It was great fun to shoot, if a little tough to get the timing.

Viking is available from my online shop now, along with all the other downloads and limited edition prints. So head on over there to get your copy and enjoy all the images of James in his Viking, sexy glory.

So many other options

Today was just another day, in so many ways like all the other days. I was at work. I posted to Instagram and I drank lots of coffee.

When I posted an image from my latest download “Viking” which was edited for Instagram suitability someone commented “Can we see the un-edited photo?” Firstly a complete lack of manners i.e. “please” is just annoying but that’s social media for you. Once I moved on from that there are couple of things about comments like this that drive me crazy. I get them all the time which itself is a bit tedious. I can’t, and won’t ever post full frontal shots on Instagram because it’s not allowed. There have been images of mine deleted because they show some pubic hair which apparently isn’t ok.

The other thing is that I sell these images. If I send the frontal images out to everyone that asks it diminishes the saleability of the downloads. I do post one or two on Tumblr to promote the downloads, if there is frontal at all. That to me is enough of a free sample. Most of the people that ask don’t actually ever intend to order one of the downloads but they want the free sample.

There are so many other options to see cock. Xtube, Xvideos, Pornhub, Tumblr are all full of it for free. People can’t really expect me to risk my Instagram account being banned just so they get to see another cock can they? I know I’ve been doing some erotic work but I don’t think my work is really wank material. Go to Tumblr and knock yourself out.

Biting the bullet

Tomorrow I turn 45 and while I have a lot to learn and things to work on, like everyone, I’m enjoying life. In the spirit of my current mood of trying to embrace things, tomorrow morning I’m ticking off a sexual fantasy bucket list item.

No, I’m not going to say what it is but all going to plan I’ll be a very contented man by the time I meet my friends in the afternoon for a drink. A mate of mine will be there which will be great. I think it’s fantastic that in the gay world it’s not unusual to have a good friend that we can mess around with from time to time without it being weird.

Am I nervous about it? Yes I am. I’m nervous about it not going well and therefore ruining a good fantasy but I’m also just nervous in general but overall I think it will be fine and I’m really looking forward to it. I’ve mentioned it to a couple of friends, including a woman from work who thinks it is hilarious. She’s not sure she will be able to look at me the same way on Monday but she did say that laughing her head off so we are good.

I’d love to hear in the comments whether any of you have lived out a fantasy and how it went. If anyone knows any hot hung gay twins that want a threesome I’d LOVE to explore that fantasy too.

The best laid plans

With a three day weekend this weekend I was had all these plans. On Saturday I had three photo shoots planned, then I was MC at the circus school’s end of term show on Saturday night. Sunday morning I had plans to do another outdoor shoot then a “gentleman caller” was due to visit and spend some quality time getting horizontal with me in the afternoon. Then on the Monday there was another group scenario to be played out.

By the end of the weekend, the only day that went to plan at all was Saturday. All the photo shoots went off without a hitch and the show went really well also. That’s it. None of the other plans for the weekend happened. The early shoot on Sunday was canned because I didn’t want the model to freeze to death and then the “gentleman caller” had a spontaneous very large night out and was in no shape for shenanigans.

Then he did that again on Sunday night so wasn’t up for the Sunday group effort and another participant got called in to work and the whole idea was scrapped. I can’t begrudge anyone their spontaneous nights out. I don’t go out all night these days but others do and it’s fun. The unplanned nights are often the best so why wouldn’t he take advantage of it?

It does mean that I had a delightfully relaxed weekend, got some photo editing done and lots of bits and pieces that I wouldn’t have otherwise. Would I have enjoyed the sex? Sure. Of course I would but sometimes these things just don’t work out as planned.

More for my wish list

My photographic process is a varied one. Sometimes I find the model for an idea and sometimes the idea is inspired by the model. Maybe I’m thinking of the beach days to come now that the weather is (slowly) starting to warm up but I’m thinking of trying to find 3-5 models to spend a day down at the nude beach down in the National Park and photographing them throughout the day.

When we see vintage photos of service men bathing in rivers or even just old photos of nudist beaches, there is an ease and comradeship that rarely comes across in modern images. I want to capture that freedom that comes with being nude in the sunshine with friends. No cares, no self consciousness, just sunshine and relaxation.

Coordinating more than one model is difficult enough but trying to find a few, or even more, to be free on the same day and hopefully willing to be photographed full frontal so that we don’t have to worry about posing too much to preserve modesty will be a huge challenge. Anyway, that is the scenario that is on my wish list. Let’s see if we can make it happen shall we?

Home is number 40!

I can’t remember exactly when I started selling downloads on my website. The first one was “(Don’t) LOOK” featuring the gorgeous Chris. That behind the scenes video had to go on Pornhub because it was too much for my YouTube channel by a long way.

Yesterday I released the 40th download for sale! When I started I had no idea how it would go and while it’s certainly not making me rich they have developed a bit of a following which is really nice to see. For number 40 I went back through the archives and thought I’d share all the shots of Laria with you from this series. I submitted these to a website but they were turned down because their subscribers don’t “respond well to black men”. Seriously? Are we still in an age where people are still so racist that companies don’t feature people of colour? Yes.

A well known gay publication has in their list of guidelines to photographers, no black men and definitely no asians. It’s crazy.

Anyway, in this 40th download Laria is sitting around at Home looking amazing and enjoying the pleasures of his body as a naked man alone is likely to do. You should definitely check it out. All the other downloads are still for sale as well so feel free to buy all of them.

Get on it!

My youtube channel has taken on a life of it’s own, mostly because of one video. I’m not sure why it’s taken off recently but a few months ago I was well under 1,000 subscribers but now it’s over 2,000. All the comments are on the video of Jorge at the beach so I’m guessing that it’s been posted somewhere and it’s driving traffic. It’s weird that all these new subscribers have come along and I haven’t posted anything for months.

Even on all the photo shoots I’ve done recently I haven’t been filming because there have been so many I would just never get the chance to edit all the footage. Today I’m trying to break that bad habit. Three photo shoots back to back in the studio this morning and I’m going to try and get enough footage for a three-in-one behind the scenes video.

Let’s see how we go because it’s hard to think about photo and video and orchestrate both in a small space without losing the flow of the shoot.

Pondering the question

When someone raises a question that really makes you think in a public forum it’s always fascinating to hear the range or responses. One of my models yesterday posed a couple of questions in his Instagram stories that were really fascinating and apparently he got a LOT of people weighing in with their opinions.

The questions were essentially, if you are a top or a bottom is it about the sensation of that role physically or is the role that you are into with that role. I went on to discuss this with a friend last night. For me my role depends on my mood but I’m very happy to say that I’m genuinely 50/50 split. A lot of people make jokes at that. Maybe this is something I should ask the guy from the orgy I went to a couple of weeks ago.

For my friend who told me last night that he’s much more of a bottom, it’s definitely about the sensation. For me, as a versatile guy, it’s mood and sensation. It’s a very personal thing being penetrated. More so than doing the fucking. There are days where I’m dying to be fucked and others where I really want to fuck but I enjoy both equally. Having said that there are days where I just don’t feel up to the vulnerability of trusting someone to fuck me.

Last year I went to a big orgy organised by a group that does it semi-regularly here in Sydney and there were a lot more guys that I’d fuck than I’d let fuck me. Does that mean it is about the role? I don’t know. Feel free to weigh in on your own experiences in the comments!