Do you ever feel like life just isn’t giving you a break? Maybe I’m just not learning lessons and life is just trying to teach me.

At the moment I’m going through one of my lonely phases. Really lonely. As usual it seems to coincide with a long drought of sexual action. It also coincides with doing some gay weddings as a celebrant. So far at all the weddings I’ve been to, including three same sex weddings and one straight wedding of a couple with a lot of LGBT friends, there have been at most one single gay man at any wedding, most there have been none.

I fully realise that I’m probably the problem. A dear friend saw a psychic a couple of weeks ago and even he said that I’m keeping men away. He’s never even met me.

So how do I fix my attitude? Right now I am wallowing in self pity wondering why everyone else seems to get a chance at love but I don’t. It sounds silly but as of last night I started a week long introductory meditation program designed to boost self esteem. It can’t hurt.