In times of ever growing acceptance of LGBT people in society, especially amongst younger people, the distinction between gay and straight is getting harder to see.

Recently a video of a beautiful male model doing a Q&A vlog came to my attention. He was answering all the usual mundane questions that models get asked. What grooming does he do etc etc. One of the questions was however “Are you gay or straight?”. He answered that he was straight as an arrow, “probably straighter”.

It’s important that he elaborated that he was even straighter than something completely straight. If not we might have thought that he was lying and there might have been some wiggle room there. Like a reality tv contestant giving 150% effort, over stating your straightness is the only way we pesky predatory homosexuals will ever understand that there is no chance.

Of course it would also damage his career to catastrophic proportions if people suspect there is even a hint of unstraightness. How would we buy clothes he models if he’s next to a woman but we don’t think they are having sex? It will just never happen. Much better that he pouts next to a woman we know he MUST be sexually attracted to.

Don’t forget it’s our job as homosexuals to be careful not to offend the delicate ego of the oppressed straight male.