When I photographed the #barenakedtruth project for My People My Tribe, it was all or nothing for me. So not only was I lucky enough to try and capture everyone’s beauty and their story in photos, I submitted my own story and had my photo taken as well.
Like a lot of people that took part I really struggled with what to write and I re-wrote it a few times. Knowing that we only have about a week left of images and stories to be shared the time when my image and story went up was getting inevitably closer until today, when it was shared by Josh, the brains and driving force behind the series. To be honest I was really nervous about it going up. Firstly because when I had those photos taken I was feeling about as unattractive as I have ever felt and secondly because I was worried that people would think my story was drama-queen bullshit looking for compliments. It’s not.
My story is honest and it’s what I’m trying to work through. Since the day of the shoot and writing my story, I have also come to the realisation that I’m quite content being single. That’s not to say I don’t still have lonely days but they are less.
So. Above is the image that went live today and below, is my story as shared by My People My Tribe
. It feels a little raw and confronting but very special to have been a part of this beautiful project.
“I’ve never been a wildly confident guy but I have had a life filled with a fair bit of fun and adventure so far. There have been short-term relationships and sexual encounters. Picking up some emotional baggage along the way from failed romances, dating people I should have stayed clear of and a gay world telling me I’m unrealistic and even stupid for wanting monogamy, my confidence is about as low as it’s ever been. Now in my forties the feelings of never being “enough” combined with not being happy with a body that I’ve taken for granted all these years leaves me wondering if I’ll ever find someone to love or if I’ll even know how to be a decent partner if I do.”