I recently photographed a guy for the third time and was struck, along with how gorgeous he is, how down to earth he is. In Sydney, the body and the looks reign supreme it would seem and far too many guys rely on that and that alone to get by. There are guys I know who are hot but have nothing to back it up. They might be intelligent but they don’t use it. They may be sweet but they don’t show it. Instead they rely on having a sixpack, pecs and a good jawline while displaying them at the right parties.

The model that I’m talking about tonight goes out partying but goes to have a great laugh with his friends. He gets photographed and like anyone, likes some attention. We all do, but he doesn’t need it or seek it. It took me a while to work out why he was so relaxed and lovely and I’m sure there is a lot more to it than the theory that I’m about to put forward but I’m sure it goes a long way.

He’s been in a happy monogamous relationship for a couple of years now with another lovely guy. He met and started dating his current boyfriend a few months after breaking up with a partner of six years. Given he’s only in his late 20’s now, that means that he’s been in happy relationships for his adult life. We were chatting on the shoot, the three of us that were there, about Grindr etc and he’s never been on any of them. He’s not jaded or bitter by being single on Sydney’s gay scene. He’s not been hurt and isn’t carrying around the baggage that the rest of us are.

So THAT is the secret! Too late for most of us.