It doesn’t make sense

Something has been bugging me of late when I’ve been trawling through my feed on tumblr. Tumblr is mostly porn for a lot of us and there is some seriously sexy stuff on there. I follow a variety of tumblr blogs to satisfy whatever porn mood I might be in to have a wank on any given day, from vanilla stuff, muscle head stuff, a bit of kink whatever. One thing that really doesn’t do it for me is derogatory sex. My flatmate and I are both on the same page about this. We had a discussion the other night about it and it baffles both of us.

Now I know some people are into role play dom/sub stuff and that’s not what I’m talking about. What I’m worried about is the stuff where someone feels the need to completely debase their sexual partner. “Faggot needs to earn daddy’s cock”, “Faggot doesn’t have an arse he has a pussy to be used when I tell him he’s earned it.” and things like that. What kind of ego problems or insecurities does someone have that they need to make someone feel worthless to have sex with them? That says way more about the one doing the degrading than the one being degraded.

Maybe it’s my own insecurities coming into play but I prefer my sex to be an equal footing kind of arrangement where both parties are getting their needs and desires met, not for one to do exactly what they want with little regard to what the other person wants or needs.

3 Responses to “It doesn’t make sense”


  1. 1 Peter

    I’ve met gay men that like to degrade people like that and I always think it has to do with them not wanting to be perceived as a feminine gay or a woman or anything of that sort. It probably has to do with the whole “transitioning” from straight to gay but still wanting to look macho. These people are just not comfortable in their own skin. We need to embrace the gay and the rainbows that come with it! :)

  2. 2 sunwarrior

    We are all equally divine masculine and divine feminine. Some people are really scared or untrusting of their inner male or female selves and express this outwardly through behaviour as you describe Brenton. I don’t like how it makes me feel when I see this playing out before me, but I try not to let this overshadow my compassion for a fellow soul trying to learn through experiences…

  3. 3 Billy

    Or it could be just what a guy wants. Some subs are very take charge in control type A in trw, but behind closed doors they want to give that control to some one else.

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