Last week I engaged in a conversation with someone that I probably shouldn’t have on Scruff. He messaged me first with only a photo of his chest on his profile. His opening line was “Hey asshole”. I thought at first it might have been a friend of mine with a misguided attempt at humour but no when I asked him if I knew him he said no and asked if I was upset. After a little digging and asking why he would try and engage someone in conversation that way he said “I’m not white aussie like you, racist fucktard.” Um… what?

Turns out that he’s lived all over the world and said that he finds Australians the “dumbest” of anywhere and gets the most racism here of anywhere. I suggested that as an adult who doesn’t like living where he is, perhaps a better solution would be to move countries. I’m still not sure why I persisted but I pointed out that being aggressive and accusing someone of racism without any mention of race was unfair and that yes, Sydney can be very harsh on some races especially in the gay scene, but I refuse to be included in the racist headcount. Grudgingly this guy admitted that perhaps not everyone was the same and did I want to catch up? No. I suggested therapy.

Unfortunately part of what he says is true. It’s far more common to see “No Asians” on a profile than not which I find horrible. Why are the asian guys being singled out? Why can’t we agree to all list things we DO find attractive on our profiles and politely decline those that we don’t find attractive? There are racial groups that I generally don’t find as attractive as others but I’m not going to turn down everyone in that or any group without even a glance. There are exceptions to every rule in life.