An interesting thought.

Something that has been niggling at me for a long time has finally got to the point where I thought I’d bring it up here on the blog. None of this blog post is a criticism, more of a questioning observation. I’ve often wondered why we as humans celebrate most often the traits in people that they have no control over. We also condemn the same way. I do it, we all do it. It’s human nature.

“What the hell is he on about now?” you ask. Let’s start close to home, in the gay community or as men in general. We all celebrate or hold up as the ideal, a big cock. Did that person who is blessed with one do anything to achieve it or earn it? Nope. Genetic luck gave him that big meaty object of desire. Being really short is something that is often made fun of, but why? Why is red hair usually the source of ridicule at school? Why are a straight nose and a wide smile considered things to aspire to?

We can all work harder on our body and yes, a fit body is celebrated too but not in the same way. There are lots of things that we do actually achieve or earn that are celebrated as well but if someone has a nice arse, a big dick, beautiful eyes or blonde hair, things that are lusted after and desired, we tell them they are better than people that don’t but it’s not like it’s our fault if we don’t have those things. Just wondering why?

13 Responses to “An interesting thought.”


  1. 1 kazza

    It is indeed “an interesting thought.” Humans are drawn to what is the (current) aesthetically pleasing form. It’s unfortunate that more time isn’t given to someone’s kindness and their pure heart as opposed to looks, cock size or whatever else is considered ‘hot.’ Don’t get me wrong I like to look, but what gets me every time is kindness and humble intelligence, they’re the biggest turn-ons for me. Shame more people weren’t so much about the superficial isn’t it.

  2. 2 Ojo

    There is a Bible story that deals with this issue. It is wonderful that God see what is important in each person…He knows all the good and bad points and still loves us.

    1Sa 16:6 When Jesse and his sons arrived, Samuel saw Eliab and thought, “Surely this is the man who the LORD has chosen.”
    1Sa 16:7 But the LORD said to Samuel, “Eliab is tall and handsome, but don’t judge by things like that. God doesn’t look at what people see. People judge by what is on the outside, but the LORD looks at the heart. Eliab is not the right man.”

  3. 3 Steve

    In spending time with my nieces and nephews, I’ve always told them that making fun of any physical trait on a person is just plain wrong and unacceptable. So the reverse is also true. Maybe because it’s more physically obvious and doesn’t require any investment in the other person such as is required to know if they’re smart, funny, well-read, etc. Maybe we focus on the superficial because we’re more comfortable staying isolated within ourselves.

    Anyways, good food for thought, Brenton! Good luck with the exhibition.

  4. 4 Mark

    As one who has been teased and bullied all my life, I understand what you mean. I have a small cock and I have suffered because of that too. I look at the beautiful men in your pics and dream. I have been looking for love for over 45 years but have found nothing and find now that I try to be invisible so as not to have my faults seen. I just hope that I have beauty within that can sometimes shine.

    Thank you Brenton for your words and pics…I hope all goes well with your show. I hope you can show them here sometime or at least make a book so we can buy it!

    I guess the most important is that we gay men care for and support each other no matter what our flaws. Hugs to you all

  5. 5 Richard

    We want that which is the most common trait. In the world of beauty, those traits which are most common, are the most beautiful. This is why the conception of beauty changes based on country and era. Look to the classic nude male sculpture as a perfect example. None of those nudes have a large penis. In fact, those with a large penis at that time were seen as undesirable and made fun of in the form of the god Priapus.

    What has changed in our era is that the only dicks most of us see are the elephantine idiosyncrasies that are put on display in mainstream, lewd, and pornographic materials. Anyone that is accustomed to nudist/naturist materials, publications, and situations will see that the classic proportions are still the gold standard of true beauty.

  6. 6 David Asset

    Well, we also admire people who are talented, people who are smart, people who are naturally athletic etc. or possess a natural singing voice. These too are qualities and/or talents people are lucky enough to be born with. I suppose these blessings require a certain amount of work on the part of the recipient, much more so that on the part of the lucky soul born with a big dick but it’s a shining example of how life simply isn’t fair.

  7. 7 Smooth kiwi

    you and me baby we ain’t nothing but mammals,sometimes lust and competition get in the way of logic

  8. 8 Tony (LT)

    Maybe on some level celebrating the things we have control over may be admitting failure when we have not achieved them ourselves.

  9. 9 Nat Nasci

    Ego plays a part. A person who is lucky enough to have physical attributes that others adore can over time believe themselves to be
    ” better ” than others, but not all. The magic combination of what someone finds attractive and a pleasing, modest personality works best for me. Arrogance is a huge turn off for most people.
    Media plays a part of course but peoples sexual tastes are still wide and varied. I know many couples where one is hot, the other not. Maybe I’m just a romantic but I still believe in love.
    I know someone who used to run a gay website for men with small cocks and men who were attracted to them. There were many. Self confidence about who you are is what matters. People can smell insecurity a mile away.

  10. 10 BosGuy

    Brenton –

    Great post and excellent question.

    I’m not sure I have a sufficient answer but I love the fact that you raised the question. By asking readers on some level you force each of us to do a bit of soul searching. Perhaps that explains the variety of responses from readers who have already shared their thoughts.

    By asking this question to readers it raises an awareness and hopefully makes us more sensitive to this behavior in the future.

    BosGuy

  11. 11 michael_nm

    It’s not often that I disagree with you, however, this time I will. I doubt very much that the first thing a person sees is a big cock and hence find that person attractive and someone they want to know. Most introductions are face to face and fully clothed – sure it’s an advantage not to look too hideous, but, the one who wins listens, takes an interest and contibutes.
    The question you are posing is one of reflection – how shallow are we? … and in particular – what do we really value?
    I would say get over it – we are attracted to people for a number of reasons – surely as a photographer you know each subject is different as you try to capture some essence to tell a story and some of that must relate to some truth to their character as well as their looks.
    Besides anyone who truly does as you suggest is likely to be some not worth knowing.
    As a regular reader it disappoints me when you are so hard on yourself. You are what you always have been a very nice guy who inspires many of your readers including me.

  12. 12 Jack Moss

    Great post Brenton. In regards to a gorgeous big penis and beauty in general I believe it’s in our DNA to admire and desire, just as being gay is in our DNA (if you are certain you are gay or indeed bi). A monster cock turns me on everytime.

  13. 13 jock

    Brenton, I like a nice face on a nice body, and a nice personality inside. No need to be overly built, just in good shape with a clean and healthy look. I don’t get the whole deal about big cocks. Average ones that are in proportion to the body look the best. Almost any guy looks good naked if he is confident and relaxed with it. Cockiness and an ‘I’m all that’ attitude can negatively outweigh the best body. But then, I am just admiring a male body for its natural and artistic beauty of form and those are the qualities that fit. Some of us straight guys love the naked male form, and love to get naked, and love our buddies – just not to the point of having sex.

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