Every now and then my mind goes to some odd places, sometimes inspired by things I’ve seen, sometimes not. On the weekend I had seen lots of hot straight guys around and I got to thinking about what the collective noun for a group of hot straight men would be. It could also be the same term straight women use for a group of hot gay men. I’m claiming creation rights to the term, a group of hot straight men is now known as a ‘Frustration’.

Of course once I started down that path my mind went wandering. What would you call a group of lesbians? I toyed with the idea of calling them a ‘Birkenstock’ but figured the company might not like me co0pting their name. I also toyed with a ‘Menstruation’ but oddly enough it didn’t sit well on my tongue. Eventually I decided that, in honour of the lesbian specific (and baffling) sex act, the collective noun for a group of lesbians is a “Scissor”.

This is, of course a list that I shall be adding to over time. I’m also naming a group of young children a ‘Mess’, a group of parents shall be known as a ‘Breed’ and a group of screaming One Direction fans will be known to me as a ‘Terror’.