It seems that as a community we often wonder why we have a bad reputation for promiscuous and over the top behaviour. Some of that reputation may well be justified.
A friend was telling me he was at the nude beach in Perth the other day and putting sunscreen on his face, eyes closed, when he felt someone touching him, looked down and a gentleman was sucking him off, right there on the beach, not in the dunes, no eye contact signals, no welcomed approach, just gulped him down. When my friend shoved him off and told him to get lost, the “gentleman” told him it wasn’t his fault my friend was uptight.
Uptight? Seriously? That is downright blatant sexual assault. How on earth is my friend being uptight?
Two other friends, a couple, have just had a holiday in Asia and at one point stayed at a clothing optional gay resort. One night the two of them were in their villa, nude, just chatting and relaxing when in walks the owner of the resort. No knock on the door and no “do you mind if I come in?” He proceeded to stay and make conversation for 45 minutes, my friends too polite and stunned to ask him to leave.
Are we so focused on getting our rocks off that basic courtesy, or even law, doesn’t come into the equation just because opportunity gave a knock? It’s a select few trouble makers, as in any demographic, that earn a bad reputation and undo all the progress we’ve been making.
Just because you’re nude, it doesn’t mean someone has the right to be rude or lewd! Somehow some people don’t make that distinction. The other day in the gym steam room, I was relaxing after a work-out with my eyes half-closed and the next thing I saw was an erect dick in my face. I brushed the guy aside and his comment was, “Sorry man, I was sure that you were gay!” I told him that I was indeed gay but I didn’t ask him to bring his dick over to my face. He left abruptly as if I were the rude one. Some people just don’t get it.
Agreed… there is a time and place for everything. I’ve definitely been a dirty bird on the beach, but it was mutual. I’ve been laying out… relaxing and tanning my butt… and had guys slide between my legs and start eating my ass out… I just politely say “No thank you buddy”. I guess it could be a compliment, but really!
“Nudity is an expression, not an invitation.”
The one time I went to Las Vegas, I stayed at a gay guesthouse. The first night, the owner came into my room and climbed into my bed. He wanted to fuck me, without a condom, no-less. I said no and he left. I made sure the door was locked behind him and for the second/last night. I’ve not been back to Las Vegas since.
Agree wholeheartedly! The behaviour of a few individuals including what I’ve witnessed over the years particularly on free beaches (both west and east coasts) has the potential both to lose the benefit of these facilities as well as give the gay community in general a bad name.
It’s not just in clothing-optional areas. I’ve had to actually tell one of my best friends that I won’t hang out with him if he’s hanging out with certain friends of his, because when we all go out for drinks together, they start hitting on me aggressively and do not stop even when I make it explicitly clear that I’m not interested. I’m talking physically aggressive: hands up my shirt, hands down my pants, etc. It’s like there’s this attitude that if you, as a man generally and as a GAY man in particular, are not up for sex with any guy at any moment, there is something horribly wrong with you. I’ve actually been told that I offended guys when I rejected advances like that. Excuse me??
And yes, it’s nice to be desired, but it’s not nice to be desired like THAT.
I agree with Icon’s comment. I can’t believe how insensitive some gay men are. Is it any wonder why nude beaches have earned such a bad reputation.
I think it is in part how society in general views nudity and sex; usually equating them, or that nudity leads to sex. Perhaps if there was more recognition in society of the quote Icon mentions, there might be less of this abuse.
Also, Brenton, when I read in your post; “That is downright blatant sexual assault”, I remembered seeing online ads on how ‘men can stop rape’. One in particular focused on gay relationships.
I would say that more of these situations should be reported to the police as sexual harassment, assault, or rape, whatever the case may be.
I’ve used those ATMs!!