It’s no secret that a relationship is something I want, but every now and then the world conspires to tell me that maybe that’s the dumbest thing I could ever want.
Friends all around me are having relationship troubles. One couple is having major trust issues, leading to major arguments on a semi-regular basis with both of them calling me to discuss issues, but making me swear not to talk to the other one about it. Of course, when you swear, you swear on something important to you. My poor Kylie collection may need an exorcism at this rate.
Another couple swears black and blue that opening up their relationship over a year ago has saved it. To the close but external viewer it looks somewhat like Meryl Streep and Goldie Hawn at the end of Death Becomes Her, something once beautiful but patch and filled and resprayed around the edges. I might have the wrong end of the situation but I’m not coping watching it happen as I care for them both dearly.
The other situation is a love triangle, square… multiple sided shape, that is filled with obsession, lust, new sparks, and old flames. If something’s burning that hot, don’t freaking touch it.
When you’ve got all those people crying on your shoulder and bending your ear you can’t help but end up twisted. Now, if you’ve survived all those mixed metaphors, bizarre likenesses and rants, you’ll understand why I feel like running away to a deserted island alone.
Hmmmmm – I find all these dramas……………….. tiring.
Sorry. There are people out there that can be broken down into a couple of relationship types…
(1) Those who WANT the relationship to be problematic. Drama queens but in a shared capacity.
(2) Those who desperately want a best friend and companion, but are conflicted about having a relationship.
(3) Those who like the IDEA, but dont want to put in the work.
(4) Those – like my husband and I – who understand that relationships require work and attention – not overpowering – and there will be ups and downs but ultimately the return on investment is worth it.
Tell you friends to pull their finger out and stop fucking you up with it.
Having actually spent some quality time chatting with you now B, I can guarantee you would belong to the type that hubby and I do.
Your friends, seem to relish stumbling from crisis to crisis like a drunken tranny on K-Road.
They aint you mate. Dont take it on board.
I’ve been happily married (it’s Canada) for over three years, together much longer. We’re soul mates, best friends – and very happy together. It can happen. DTNZ is exactly right in point 4.
you say all that but it just an excuse you tell yourself when you do notice how alone you are. because thats what i say. “why be in a relationship?” but you so want to be. all a defense mechanism.
Hang in there: a) when you get to that deserted island, it won’t be deserted anymore and b) you’ll be there without even the possibility of friendship or love.
Oh…we are 14 years in, my husband and I. And we have been seeing a couple’s counselor for the last 5 months. It’s been worth it. All about listening more to each other. Really listening. And we are finding out how to be in love all over again.
Relationships are damn hard. They take a lot of work. And when you fall in love it seems that everything will work out just fine- without much struggle. It does until the bloom is off the rose, and you hit that rock in the road. Then you know what love really is. And isn’t. You also know who your friends really are. And they are usually not more than you can count with one hand. My feeling, from one’s who’s been there and back? Don’t let yourself get sucked into relationship drama. Love’em and let it go. It isn’t you.
Have always thought of it this way: To have a Prince to have to be a Prince.