This morning was the 6th and final session of my counselling sessions. I think it would be clear to most long-term and even short-term readers of this blog that the overriding issues I was having were relationship focusses. While I won’t be going into where it all stemmed from, it wasn’t necessarily where I thought.
It’s amazing how a good counsellor, and I was lucky enough to have a really good one that worked well with me and understood what was bothering me, can force you to confront demons that you didn’t know you had but were in fact causing the other issues.
Things that I had given absolutely zero thought to have actually played a huge part in my lack of confidence and therefore the way I handle a lot of situations. Friends have noticed a change in the past 6 weeks and while I’m not a totally different person, I’d like to think I appreciate the person I always was a bit more. There’s a bit of frustration and I guess grieving over all that wasted time letting things pass me by because of insecurities, but I’m going to do my darndest to recognise that stuff early and put and end to that. After this morning’s final session and the things we discussed, I almost feel like the guy in these photos looks. No I don’t mean young, hung and with a great six pack sadly, but on the edge of possibility, looking forward expectantly.